Like your standard ‘matches to make next’, but with an emphasis on fantasy and a disregard for probability. Basically, fights that should happen, but probably won’t.
Carlos Condit: Don’t leave, Carlos, we can change!
In one of the most flagrant displays of rule bending ever seen inside of the cage, Carlos Condit was robbed of victory by some underhanded treachery from known cheat, Demian Maia.
ISN’T IT TIME WE CLAMPED DOWN ON THIS SHIT?
Anyway, nobody cares about the results these days, so let’s just give Condit the title shot he deserves* and get him in there with welterweight champion, Stephen Thompson.
Icing on the kick? KICK MAIA OUT OF MMA.
*This is the title fight I deserve, so button it.
Jim Miller: Groundhog Day
Yeah, it was a fun fight. Yeah, it meant nothing.
Just let Jim Miller and Joe Lauzon fight one another until either man retires, that way we get an actual winner. No need for this judges’ decision toss, last man standing/alive. Bring them together every couple of months, make them fight for fifteen minutes and then forget the result.
You love this sort of fight, so let’s force feed it to you on a regular basis.
Anthony Pettis: Eat for victory!
I cannot accept that this was a good look for Anthony Pettis, figuratively or literally.
There’s an idea in MMA that moving down in weight can reinvigorate one’s career, give that fighter the physical advantage they’ve been missing previously. Apparently, even being the champion in a division isn’t enough to suggest a fighter is competing at the correct weight. A few losses will soon rewrite history, and suddenly we’re looking at somebody stepping in there with giants. Anthony Pettis was a lightweight champion, he even defended his belt. Dropping that title to a stylistic nightmare in Rafael dos Anjos was no disgrace, nor was losing a contentious decision to now-champion Eddie Alvarez. The real trouble came when Pettis lost to Edson Barbosa – three fights in a row? What’s this guy even doing at 155lbs? Time to Edgar this situation and move down to featherweight, ‘cos he’s always been a featherweight really, right? When Pettis condemned Benson Henderson to a never-ending highlight reel hell? Featherweight. Defending the UFC lightweight title against former Strikeforce champion, Giblert Melendez? Featherweight.
Does anyone out there doubt that Frankie Edgar could be a top-five lightweight right now? Dropping weight does not = success.
Just ask Ross Pearson…
Anthony Pettis vs. Frankie Edgar. At lightweight.
Paige VanZant: Can we stop this, please?
Who Paige VanZant fights next is not what’s bothering me, shutting up the dribbling, masturbating, bed wetters, is.
If I have to read one more ‘IS SHE REALLY A FIGHTER THO?’ I’m shutting the internet down. Just because you like a person’s face, that’s not cause to question their ability to fight in a cage. I mean, I’m amazed at how Luke Rockhold manages to throw punches and kicks, but he does!
Don’t care about Dancing With The Stars, don’t care about the tent you’re pitching in your pants, don’t care about your ‘personal rankings’.
There are plenty of people in life that you’ll find attractive, in all walks of life, get over it. Should you ever leave the confines of your mother’s basement (worth considering), you may struggle.
I should be writing about who VanZant fights next, but I’m not. I’m wasting my time and yours, writing about the same boring, tired shit I wake up to every time she fights. Stop it, please.
Personally, VanZant vs. Courtney Casey sounds good to me, but what do I know? I’m off to rank the middleweight division in order of fuckability.
