OK, so Michael Bisping basically ruined this game for everyone but our superior, Lloyd Wharton. ALL HAIL THE CHAMP (Mike and Lloyd, that is).
The show must go on, however. Those of us still standing continue our journey, bravely forging onwards, despite knowing we can never truly win now.
F*** you, Mike, and f*** you, Lloyd.
THE STANDINGS
|
Rank |
Name |
Bankroll |
|---|---|---|
|
1 |
JJ Saddington |
£11.79 |
|
2 |
Ben Heather |
£10 |
|
3 |
Martin Ives |
£6.50 |
|
4 |
Brad Wharton |
£6 |
|
5 |
Chris Scadden |
£2 |
THE CARD
Sandwiched neatly between a stacked UFC 199 and the entire week of glorious mayhem that awaits us during July’s International Fight Week, anyone would have forgiven Fight Night 89 for being barren of compelling content. Yet here we are, ready to tuck in to a PPV headline quality main event and a supporting bill that makes up for with style what it lacks in substance.
Rory MacDonald’s ultra-violent slugfest with Robbie Lawler earned his his spot in that ‘God Tier’ level of hard bastards. While he isn’t as rough and ready as ‘Ruthless’, he’ll be the gritty hitter to Stephen ‘Wonderboy’ Thompson refined finesse on Saturday night.
Lightweight gatekeeper to the stars Donald Cerrone continues his weird experiment of fighting not-quite-relevant welterweights in his co-main event clash with Patrick Cote, while kickboxing specialists Valérie Létourneau and Joanne Calderwood will no doubt put on a clinic. For those who like their striking more ‘face-punchy’, ice hockey enforcer Steve Bosse and Sean O’Connell are on hand.
Even the prelims are packed with tasty morsels. The world’s toughest nerd – Tamden McCrory – returns to the cage, former heir apparent to Fedor Ion Cutelaba finally gets his UFC call up, while former title challengers Ali Bagautinov and Joe Soto get low-key runs out early on.
It’s a good night for betting too, with some live dogs and cheeky props.
(The above was written by Brad Wharton, shortly before running off and leaving me to mop up his half-finished mess)
THE BETS
All bets are ‘to win’ unless otherwise denoted.
JJ Saddington: Well, it looks I’ve moved into first place. Like when GSP walked away, somebody’s got to be champ. Even if it’s by default.
Cerrone/Cirkunov – £1.79
The method behind the madness: If it all goes wrong, I’ll still have my original £10 stake. Though I’ve started my reasoning with a fairly negative point, these are the kinda fights Cerrone wins (non-title/big fights) and Cirkunov is Latvian. I’m not explaining that last point.
Ben Heather: Mr Heather is stepping up to the plate as my only true opposition. That he’ll fail is not in doubt, it’s all about the manner in which he accepts defeat now.
Beal/Côte/Létourneau to finish treble – £2.50
The method behind the madness: I think the size is going to be too much in the Cote and Jojo fights so have picked the bigger fighter. As for Beal, I’m hoping for another spectacular KO to help increase the funds.
Chris Scadden: Despite almost being out of £, Mr Scadden is desperately holding on for UFC 200. Expect some real pennies to be thrown down when the big day arrives.
Thompson/Côte/Bossé/Létourneau/Cutelaba/Bagautinov parlay – £1
The method behind the madness: McDonald could have had his edge blunted in his last fight, whilst Thompson’s edge remains keen. And if anyone’s name ends in ‘ov’ I put money on it.
Brad Wharton: The lesser of the Wharton brothers, Brad has only his pride to play for. That’s a lie, his pride has long since departed. These bets are steeped in shame.
Theodorou/McCrory/Bagautinov treble – £2
The method behind the madness: As the cash dwindles, so does the common sense. McCrory is a balding geek, and I love that. Bagautinov is a shameless cheat and I love that. Theodorou is gosh-darn handsome…and I do love that. Who wouldn’t put two of the Queen’s finest British pounds on these gents? Not me. Fuck your double negatives.
Lloyd Wharton: In an act of pure cowardice, Mr Wharton has taken his money and run. After dropping his entire stash of cheddar on Bisping taking out Rockhold, Lloyd was feeling the pressure of the top spot and retired. Despite breaking through the three-figure barrier, it was only a matter of time before someone slapped that crown off his head. Either that or he needed to pay for something to do with his car – YOU DECIDE.
Martin Ives: Another one bites the dust. Mr Ives has decided to shoot his load on a yankee – whatever that means. Safe to say this will be Martin’s last stand, salute
McCrory, Létourneau, Cerrone, Thompson yankee – £6.50
The method behind the madness: Gone all in on a Yankee, as I’m growing quite fond of the UFC’s resident Pirate Cowboy. I’d imagine I’d HATE his politics though.
